Monday, October 4, 2010

And the reason I haven't told any family/friends about this blog..

Because I want to be able to write what I want, without worrying about it offending someone (mainly someone from Drew's family.)  

But here's where I really need to be able to vent, because to me it is just So upsetting (not the reason for the depressing weekend, thats much more serious.) Last week (less than 4 weeks before our wedding) Drews family call and demand, Yes Demand that Drew have his two younger brothers in the wedding. He is not close whatsoever to said brothers. In fact they have gone out of their way to make Drews life miserable on many occasions. They think it's a major sin to have a beer with dinner for example. Drew works 60 plus hours a week and likes to come home and unwind with a beer. They think he is being very 'sinful' and make it known that they don't approve of our life. Fine. We don't really care. But Drew did not want them in the wedding. We wanted our wedding day to be about US- and celebrating our relationship. Well after hours on the phone, Drew finally gave in. FOUR WEEKS BEFORE THE WEDDING. I was so disgusted with what/how they did this that I called his mother and told her everything I think about this situation, and how they have treated Drew etc. All his parents kept saying as an excuse was "Well this will be a good time for the brothers to reconcile" Am I really wrong to think that I don't believe our wedding should be about his brothers reconciling but about US and the 6 years we have been together, and all the hardships we have come across and overcome as OUR family? Without any help, respect or anything from his brothers? They were just worried about how it will make them look- not about how we feel, and its our wedding! I felt it outrageous that they felt that they were able to make Any demands of our wedding when they have done absolutely nothing to help. Not one single thing. My mom and us have done absolutely every single thing for this wedding- seriously mainly my mom, and his parents think they can just sit there- send me the dozens of people they want invited and then make demands about our wedding party?? Not to mention the programs were DONE, the grooms mens gifts ORDERED. Everything. So now we aren't even going to have a program because there is no way I'm doing all that work again- just so they can change something last minute.

I have been as far as possible from a bridezilla during this whole time, but now the fangs are coming out. 

Am I being completely unreasonable here? 


  1. I don't think you are being unreasonable at all.

    I plan weddings. This is a very common problem. Family members think other certain family members "need" to be in the wedding party.

    The way I've told my couples to handle the situation is to sit down or call the crabby family member and explain that this is YOUR day and you have chosen each person for a specific reason. You already have everything set and there is not enough time to make the changes that changing the wedding party comes with. Just remember it's YOUR day.

    You can't please everyone. If they are upset that they're not in the wedding party, make them ushers or guestbook attendents or something. Or even, let her be mad. She'll get over it eventually!

  2. Wow!! You poor thing. A marriage is something to celebrate and be happy about between you and your husband. I'm sorry your in-laws are ruining it for you. Chin up girl!! Stick to what you want and don't let them demand. This is YOUR wedding.

    Dawn @ Mom-a-Logues