One of the questions I get asked most by friends/strangers/online friends etc. is about child spacing. Was Jasper and Tindra's almost 5 year age gap on purpose? Do you like the age gap? What are the positives/negatives of that age gap?
For the most part, their age gap was planned. Having Jasper so young we were in No way ready financially to go ahead and have another child shortly after Jasper. Having had such a rough childbirth with Jasper I wasn't even positive I wanted any more children till he was about 2. We also wanted to get married first, study abroad, have at least Drew finish school and get a good job etc. After we had accomplished all those things, by the time Jasper was 3.5, we decided we were ready for another. It took us several months to get pregnant after we decided we were ready, giving us the 4 years and 8 months age gap between Jasper and Tindra.
I used to tell people I liked the age gap, but that if/when it came time for a third I wouldn't want that age gap again.
But the more I've thought about it over the last few months. The more grateful I am that I have had that age gap, and the more okay I am with having another good age gap between two and a hopeful third someday. There's plenty of little reasons like, only having to diaper one kid at a time, and having my body to my self again after a year and a half of pregnancy and breastfeeding. But the biggest reason why I have absolutely loved having that age gap is time.
Time alone with each of my children. Time I wouldn't have if that gap hadn't been there.
I had over four and a half years with Jasper. Just us. He was my everything. My all day and night. We have such a special relationship, and I think a big reason is because for so long it was just us. Of course Drew was in the picture also, a big part of the picture. But lets face it, the first three years of Jaspers life Drew was in class 18 hrs a week and worked another 45-50, plus all the commuting. He had Sundays and once in a while a Saturday off. After those three years were up he no longer had class but instead worked 50+ hrs a week plus commuting time before we moved into the city. So a good majority of the time it was just Jasper and I. And I wouldn't change that for anything in the world.
Then Tindra game a long and things changed. More than I even imagined possible. Jasper was only in preschool a few weeks before the summer and then I had all summer with both my babies home all day. Some days it was a lot to handle with a 5 year old and newborn who were at such different places in their life, but Jasper has always been a fairly independent child and it just worked. We had a great routine and had so many little adventures.
And then Jasper went off to full day kindergarten and it was even more of a game changer. Now Jasper was gone all day (7 hours) and it was just Tindra and I for the first time. The first few months were the hardest with adjusting (for me the hardest I think, Jasper did amazing from the start!) but then we figured out a system for that to. And having Jasper in school during the day has given me a chance to devote so much of my time during the day to Tindra like I did with Jasper all those years, and it just has worked so amazing for us!
I go back and forth on when would be a good time to add to our family, and a big part of me thinks waiting till Tindra is heading to preschool would be a good time so I get that alone bonding time with a third child as well. But I do know that deep down, you can have a house full of a dozen kids and as a mom we would still make the time and bond just as well with a new baby, tons of alone time or not.
Part of me used to feel guilty that Jasper and Tindra wouldn't get to be as close having a few years apart, but then I watch them play like this and I realize, their age gap doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if they are 1 year apart or 10 or anything in the middle, they are BFF's for life just like I am with my siblings.
I always assumed spending weekend mornings, or week night evenings watching my children at their various sporting events would just be something I had to do. Just a part of being a parent. I've never hugely enjoyed attending sporting events, except of course when theres yummy nachos involved. Just wasn't my thing. I played some sports in jr high, softball, basketball, volley ball and ran track in high school, but I was never very competitive or any good. I just did it to be around the boys if we are being totally honest here.
I never thought I would be that mom. You know the ones who gets excited, like Really excited to watch their kids games. Turns out, I was very wrong. During Jaspers first real soccer game of the season on Saturday I was so into it you would have thought I was watching my team play in the world cup. I was anxiously cheering loudly the whole time. On the edge of my seat or actually out of my seat jumping and screaming as Jasper helped lead his team to victory with his three goals (out of 5 I believe.) Afterwards I kept talking to Drew about how surprised I was with just how much I enjoyed it! Like actually Loved watching him play. This is the 3rd year he has done soccer, but honestly in the 'munchkin' league its just not the same thing. Barely any rules, and really just a mini scrimmage against other teams. But the league he is now is very similar to a real soccer game with a referee and everything and he just had a blast out there. I can't wait to watch him play for years to come and hope it's really something he will stick with!
I was too busy watching the game (and Tindra between Drew and I) that I didn't even think to take any pictures till this one right at the end taken a few seconds after he scored his hat trick goal (a soccer term I learned this weekend, guess that officially makes me a soccer mom?)
Unless you are a mother to a toddler I'm expecting zero interest on this post, and even if you are, still not super exciting. But I've had people ask about it so why not.
Tindra has been 100 percent potty trained (during the day) for about 5-6 weeks now. At around 18 months she started showing signs that she was ready, so we potty a potty chair. Those signs for her were following me into the bathroom and watching me go, saying 'mamma pee' whenever I went etc. She also started telling me when she had gone in her diaper and letting me know when it was time to change her.
After we got her potty chair (just a cheap, simple one at Ikea) she would sometimes sit on it when she was naked and go potty. When she did, we would make a big deal out of it, clap for her, give her a coconut cashew (which she thinks is candy) and lots of praise.
Around 20 months we started having 'naked mornings' when we were home. We would just put a shirt on her and let her run around naked, and most of the time when she had to pee she would run and sit on the potty and do her thang. Yes I just said thang.
Right at 22 months I was grabbing a (cloth) diaper to put on her because we were heading out and she said 'noooo, teeter no that' as in nope, not happening I'm not wearing a diaper. She went and grabbed a pair of her my little pony underwear and put them on. And that was that! She's been wearing underwear ever since and hasn't had a single accident (knock on wood!) And that's basically the story of how my not even two year old potty trained herself!
Today it's chilly and windy, but the next two days will be in the 70's! Which has me realizing I need to dig out the rest of my spring/summer clothes and see what pieces I need to add to my wardrobe. I have so, SO many dresses, but I'm severely lacking in the shorts department! Today I spent nap time online short shopping instead of folding a large pile of laundry that needs my attention, but here are some of my favorite I found!
Today I'm really excited to introduce you to Bee Chique, a fabulous new online boutique. They have lots of great dresses and tops for an affordable price, and all free shipping! I love online shopping, in fact I pretty much never step in the mall anymore, and when I see free shipping I'm Always sold! Brooke, owner of Bee Chique sent me this adorable dress and I couldn't wait to wear it! It's comfortable, has a unique pattern and it was pockets! Probably my favorite quality in a dress!
Brooke is offering up a $25 gift card to one of YOU guys, so go check her out and come back and enter! Who doesn't need a new spring dress?
Several ways to enter, make sure you leave a comment for each one you do!
Visit Bee Chique and come back and let me know your favorite item!
Go like Bee Chique on Facebook and let me know you did!