I really don't get how parents work full time and find time to do all the necessary school stuff. I guess not every school is the same as ours, and it's never quite this busy, but holy cow these last three weeks, there is something going on at Jaspers school almost every day! Last week there was a school concert, a field trip (both of which I went to, Drew the concert) and field day which took up half the school day. Drew took a half a day off and went to that as well. This week theres a poetry slam session, celebrating summer birthdays, half a day of school (early pick up, something that would be hard for working parents I can imagine) and an assembly celebrating kids who have turned in homework all year and those who haven't been tardy yet. If I had a 'real' job and wanted to be present for those events, I would have had to take off 6 days just in the past 9 school days alone! So really, working parents, how do you do it??
I had always assumed as soon as my kids were all in school full time, I would go back to work. But the busier each school year gets, I wonder if maybe that isn't the right choice for our family. We want at least one parent to be able to be there for all of our kids activities and special events, it's looking more and more likely like you can't have it all. Or can you? I would love some insight from you working parents!! Are you able to manage a career, and still be there for all your kids school activities? Not to mention swimming lessons, soccer practices and games, etc. etc. ?
Wow that's crazy. I look forward to my daughter going to school full time so I can work full time and have a consistent schedule in our lives but I mean... how in the world do you attend all those things if you have work? I can't imagine any job being okay with you taking off that often. And also, if those things are at night, how would you fit in running a household and whatnot if you're always busy with that stuff! I feel like schools expect SO MUCH from children and their parents nowadays. Way more than when I was young.
ReplyDeleteThey definitely do have a lot more going on and more expectations! Not to mention the HOURS of homework we have every week to do! There is barely time to do it all, so I can't imagine coming up at like 5 or 6 and having to do it all!
DeleteMy husband and I both work full time. I have a very understanding boss, but sometimes, it's just impossible to attend every single event. I have to pick and choose. Thankfully, my kids are cool with it. However, I get "looks" from some of the SAHM's in my daughter's classroom. I'm sorry that I have to work and can't volunteer in the classroom every other day. I'm not sure they realize just how lucky they are to be able to stay at home, or to attend every school function. I'd give anything to be able to do it all! :)
ReplyDeleteThats great you have such an understanding boss! I'm sure that makes a HUGE difference! I'm so sorry you get 'looks' from other moms, thats pathetic! There are definitely some moms like that our school too. The moms who volunteer for EVERYTHING! I also wish I could, but with a two year old at home I can't do those things either. I can't speak for other moms but I definitely feel fortunate to be at home, though some days I would almost give anything to be my husband walking out the door with his coffee in hand! :)
DeleteMy husband and I both work full time--and still find time to enjoy our children and the "extra" activities they actively participate in. What works best for us is to find activities that work around everyone's schedules. My children's activities/games/practice are generally in the evenings and weekends. Occasionally, we have something that might be during our work hours but we plan accordingly and make good use of paid time off. My husband and I have to work to provide the things we desire for our children...we want to take do nice things with our children, take vacations without wondering how we are going to pay for it, we desire to be able to buy their vehicles while they focus on school, we want our children to be able to attend the college of their choice--and not be consumed with student loan debt. These particular desires for our family cost money. With God's help we are able to manage our time between both.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you have a great system figured out for you guys! That has to be key! I have a lot of friends with both parents working crazy jobs and they somehow make it work like you guys have, I definitely admire you all!
Deletein my experience you can't have it all. you can either be active in your children's day to day activities or you can have a career.
ReplyDeleteI hope thats not the case! It seems like some have figured it out :)
DeleteI'm not a parent yet but I am a first grade teacher. Our school has a lot of those events too, and volunteer opportunities, and maybe the same 5 parents in my class show up to them all. But I don't think the kids mind when their parents aren't there. School age kids are beginning to separate their identity from their parents' and so they are just forming their own special memories. I know they make other memories with their families during their at home time, trips and ball games and stuff. They don't need to have EVERY moment together. When it comes to truly important things like a graduation or even parent teacher conferences almost every parent does show up to support their kid!
ReplyDeleteThat's a very good point! Though for my first grader he still expects and wants me at everything, but I know that SOON that probably won't be the case! Soon he could probably care less if I'm around during school activities :)
DeleteI have been thinking a lot about this lateley too. With Jason's military job he is gone a lot to different classes and on flights and just basically cant be present nearly as much as either of us would like. So when it comes time for them to be in school f/t and never knowing whats in store for the month, I'm wondering how in the world I would ever get a f/t job!
ReplyDeleteIt's crazy to think about isn't it? I bet with a schedule like that it would be next to impossible! Theres got to be a reason why it seems like so many military/air force/ navy etc have stay at home moms! I think it would be different if Drew had a normal 8-5 also, which he doesn't (more like 7-7,8,9,10 or later) I just always assumed I would work full time after kids in school but the more I think about it, I just don't see HOW! When does the grocery shopping get done, who does the cooking, who drives to every practice/game etc. Most of that stuff seems to start right at 4-5 for us, if I had a job getting off then, how does that happen? And now I'm writing another blog post!! :)
Deleteno offense to working moms, but if you work all day, even normal hours getting off at 5 or so its just not possible to be that present in your childs extra activities
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Deleteit seems like some Are able to manage it! Maybe it's one of those things you don't know how to manage until it's your life and you just figure it out? I really don't have a clue but I haven't been in that boat yet!
DeleteBoth my sister in laws have the best of both worlds work full time but very flexible so they don't miss out! One of them is a lawyer and her husband stays home and my other sister in law has a very flexable career :)
Deleteflexible career would help a ton! hopefully we will both have that when our youngest starts school ;)
DeleteI know seriously the best thing ever:)
DeleteWe work 12 hrs, so only 3 days a week. I get to pick what days I want to work. We both actually work overnights right now, so we are able to make it to field trips and stuff, we just get less sleep that day :)
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