Long story short (ish).
Before giving birth to Jasper I was a size 00- meaning I had NO hips. Even during pregnancy I could wear those jeans- up until about 7-8 months pregnant (since my belly was Above the jeans) I was told throughout my pregnancy that I most likely wouldn't have an easy labor. Nice things to tell a terrified 20 year old huh?
So here we are, 9 and a half months pregnant and I got induced, 2 weeks past my due date. I had back labor- as predicted, due to my tiny hips and Jasper's big head (Drew comes from a long line of big heads)
Roughly 30 hrs later, over 3 hrs of pushing and they told me they had about 5 minutes to get baby out our we would be doing a c section. So they brought in the forceps. Or as I referred to them as ' the salad tongs'
Within minutes, he was out. THey spent an hr stitching me up and I thought I was good to go.
Recovery was very long and painful- but I'd had an almost 9 pound baby, which is almost 10 percent of my pre pregnancy weight so I thought it was normal.
When I went into my 7 week post baby check I wasn't cleared for regular activities ( like sex and working out) like most are at 6 weeks, but again, I thought this was normal.
Things healed up. It just took a lot of time. I was as good as new, or so I thought.
When I first met with my current OB- she suggested that if I went to 39 weeks, we do a c-section, since I had so many complications during labor (way to much blood loss, placenta ripped in several pieces, etc) but if I were to go into labor on my own before 39 weeks we could go ahead with labor.
Sounded okay to me.
Starting a few weeks ago I started to get some pressure down low. The kind of pressure I didn't get last time until I was overdue with a 9 pound baby. I called my OB and they wanted me to come in to get checked out just to make sure it wasn't anything dangerous to baby.
So the good news it's not dangerous to baby at all. I'm not at any higher risk than anyone else for preterm labor or anything scary like that. But. Yes, there's always a but.
But I have some inside damage due to a combination of Jasper's large head, my small hips, and those damn forceps. Damage that has never bothered me (after those first few months after giving birth.) I didn't even know anything was different, which is a good thing! BUT, there's that damn but, it is making for an uncomfortable pregnancy. Apparently having a baby sitting on this damage is what is causing all the pressure. Fun huh?
Conclusion: Three different doctors from two different practices in 2 different states have advised me, strongly advised, that I go with a c section at 39 weeks (or earlier if I go into labor before then.) Not necessarily for the risk for baby, but risk of more damage, a lot more damage done to me.
And you know what? I'm grateful that I have OB's that are not only looking out for the health of my baby, but also looking out for my well being. They don't want me to go through more unnecessary damage that would most definitely have to be fixed with corrective surgery if I were I go through that again.
I know I will get criticism for this decision, I have already been getting it. I get that natural is best, and c sections happen all the time for no reason, but going through what I did again if I don't have to is not something I want to sign up for. I got pregnant knowing I would probably go through it all again. And having a baby is obviously worth it to me to go through that, but when I have people telling me I shouldn't, and don't need to go through that? I'm going to listen to their advise.
I get that having a c-section won't be a walk in the park. But you know what? Either is having an almost 9 lb baby with a 15 inch head ripped out with salad tongs and having too many stitches to count.
I know recover won't be easy. But I've already had a not so easy recover, so I guess I'm capable and ready to do it again! At least this time hopefully I won't get multiple bladder infections because peeing hurt too damn bad so I would hold it in all day.
At least I hopefully won't loose so much blood this, resulting in a chair being put in the shower for me to sit on so I won't faint like the first few times I showered after giving birth. Having your 15 year old brother having to try to get you up off the shower floor after you have fainted wasn't a great experience for Either one of us.
So yes, I know c sections are over used, but I don't think making this choice for myself and baby is me making the wrong, or easy, or selfish choice. I'm not having a c section because I'm tired of being pregnant, or just don't want to go through labor or any of those reasons. I'm doing it with the recommendation of several doctors, and I'm okay with this decision.
I was also a 00 most of my pregnancy, and had a nearly 34 hour HORRENDOUS labor. I begged for an epidural bc I was having such heavy contractions but dialating slowly, which they waited until I'd been labor for 18 hours already to give me (that's what happens when you use state insurance... they like to see you suffer because you aren't priority).
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I wouldn't doubt I have damage (altho I had a 7lbs baby, not 9! Geez!), which is why I'm just choosing NOT to have any more babies! I Cannot imagine going through that again. It was a horrible nightmare that I would never willingly repeat.
But if I did get pregnant, I think I'd probably make a similar decision. Don't feel bad, you are the person c-sections were meant for!
Wow, I'm sorry that you are getting criticized for this decision. Not all women are built the same and each birth is different. We each have to make the decisions that are safest for us and our babies. I had to have medical intervention (pitocin, antibiotics, water broken, wired monitors, etc) and ended up choosing an epidural during my 1st delivery. It was not the natural birth I'd planned but I still felt it was a perfect birth because the end result was a healthy baby and healthy mom. Don't let anyone get you down, you're right in following your intuition and the doctor's advice!
ReplyDeleteWell said Mama!
ReplyDeleteGoodluck with the c-section, I know a number of people who have had them recently and all went smoothly and recovery was not that bad. The key was to move around after even when you are in pain, you will heal much faster I hear.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely no judgement from this end, I have a small frame and big babies run in my husband's family so i'm a nervous wreck. I will definitely be bringing up the c-section possibility toward the end if baby is measuring large, I don't want to go through 30+ hours of labor and then end with a c-section (or damage like you had)! Goodluck!
Sometimes, a c-section is what the safest route is. When it's done for cosmetic or selfish reasons then that's when the eye rolls happen.
ReplyDeleteIf someone judges you, let them judge. They're not you! Only you can make the best decisions for you!
I admire your decision! So excited for you guys!
ReplyDeleteI was a size 2 but had easy labor and a baby with a small head - #2 was even easier (born 3 hours after we got to the hospital). I did tear quite a bit and that recovery was no fun so I can understand not wanting to make any more damage to yourself. Lycka till!
ReplyDeleteGood for you! I am planning a c section as well. I think any woman should choose.
ReplyDeleteIf a person can choose to remove a baby from this world, why can't we choose how to bring one into the world.
Take Care.
This is such a great post. I hate how some women and mothers get so judge-y with one another. Whatever is best for your baby AND for you is the best decision. Period. Whether it's an unmedicated, medicated, induced or cesarean birth. No questions asked. You seem like a strong person and I respect your decision. Hopefully by putting it out there you will encourage other mothers-to-be as well!
ReplyDeleteAs someone who has experienced painful sex (not due to childbirth), I am definitely an advocate for protecting and preventing damage your body!
WOW! That sounds so painful. I had a few stitches with my first born and it was hell.
ReplyDeleteKudos to you for going with a c-section. I would just tell people you appreciate their concern but you are doing what is best for YOU and leave it at that. Someone will always have an opinion that doesn't agree with yours...